Three Go-To Haircuts For Receding Hairlines
In 1995’s Die Hard With A Vengeance — the third (and what should’ve been final) sequel in the saga — our protagonists get roped into Simon Says with a German terrorist (played to perfection by Jeremy Irons) who blows things up when the answer’s wrong. On top of that, they’ve got to save people. Do you really think they care about those inlets on their heads?
Image: 20th Century Fox
Did you notice how that title didn’t mention balding?
That was on purpose, people.
Male pattern baldness is so common it warrants its own post (we’re on it), so don’t take this piece as a referential point on that matter.
If your hairline’s in the earlier stages of the world-famous Norwood Scale, this is your stop.
But if you’re almost bald up there and sport a doughnut on the side, there’s tailored content coming soon just for you. In the meantime, know that you’re not tumbling into the abyss of despair; No hair has looked masculine for many men (as evidenced by guys like Jason Statham on the right) and if you are, in fact, bald, you know this deep down.
And we’ll assume transplant surgery’s out for the rest of you. Way to commit.
Here, then, are three no-fuss options if your hairline’s bowing out.
I. The Safe, But Unbeatable Buzz Cut
Look how cool Jason Statham looks not giving a toss about his hairline.
Image: Wiki Commons
Popularized by every national army imaginable and immortalized by such legends as late fashion designer, Alexander McQueen, and the guys from Prison Break, the buzz cut has never put its foot wrong. And there’s no hairstyle as low maintenance that looks as good.
That said, head shape matters for this cut; buzz cuts bring out everything besides your hair. Ask your barber to give it to you straight on this, and if it’s a “no,” they’ll suggest something else with your name on it.
How to Ask For It:
You’d think “give me a buzz cut” would yield ideal results, but there’s more this style than running clippers along your dome.
A buzzcut looks best when there’s a little more length on top than the sides, but we’re talking as short a cut as it gets here. That means a two (max three) on top with a zero (or even double zero) for the sides is sweet spot territory.
Creating contrast is key here if you want some depth.
A Cleaner, More Direct Alternative
Speaking of Statham, have you seen his new flick, Wrath of Man? In yet another team-up with British director, Guy Ritchie (the guy who made Snatch), Statham plays a brooding security guard who disposes bad guys with robotic, Bourne-like precision. This blurb won’t spoil why, but it will remind you that if you want to shave your head clean — the way Statham did for his latest role — you’ll be entering a hallowed place, one in which legends like Bruce Willis and Terry Crews… and Mr. Statham, reside.
II. The Classic Slick-Back
Bobby De Niro’s chilling turn as real life gangster, Jimmy Conway, is what made Scorsese’s Goodfellas the opus it is. Conway’s also a good guide for how to do a slick-back when your hairline hasn’t quite bailed, but you can tell it’s pulled away some. Whether there’s shine or not’s up to you.
Image: Warner Bros.
With a receding hairline, a well-executed slick-back (duck tail optional) proclaims your apathy toward losing hair. You’re cool with showing the world your androgen’s hang-ups. And why not? You’ve earned the right to be like this.
A slick-back in the face of a receding hairline is bold, but if you’re sitting at a three or higher on that aforesaid Norwood scale, start picturing yourself with a buzz cut.
How to Ask For It:
You might get flak from your barber for making such a bold move. Plow through this resistance and insist transparency is your zen. Tell them you want enough length on top to style.
How to Style It:
Want some shine? Pomade’s the way to go. Just make sure your hair’s not wet before you use it or it won’t hold; towel-dried hair’s that sweet spot you want when it’s product time.
Don’t want any shine? Grab a matte clay for a subtler look. Pick a palm, put some product on it then rub those hands until you can’t see it. Now work it through your hair, root to tip.
III. The Peaky Blinders (otherwise known as the “French Crop”)
Art: Sanchit Chaudhary
Like good music and perfect tailoring, the Crop (“French” optional) was big in England before it made its way across the pond to us. This time, though, there’s logic to the delay; Stark contrast operates front and center with the “crop,” so not every man can wear it well (nor will many men try).
But if you can pull it off, you’re in distinguished company; few haircuts can make a statement and stay subtle like this one.
How to Ask For It:
There’s a good chance your barber’s watched Peaky Blinders, but if they haven’t, they’ll like know what a “French Crop” is. Just say you want yours to blend into the top with a high fade. If you don’t, they may give you a “disconnection” (the opposite of a fade, where stark contrast is formed by a visible line that separates cropped hair on the sides from longer, more textured hair on top) and those are an acquired taste. Plus, there’s nothing like a tight fade.
How to Style It:
Either a clay or a styling paste will work. As aforementioned, get some product on your palms, rub your hands ‘till it’s invisible then work it through your hair in a downward motion (root to tip, no excuses) until you can tell the product’s done it’s job.
Is your hair thinning? Easy: Go with the paste; it’ll thicken things and add texture temporarily.