A Man's Guide to Grooming His Eyebrows
If only one could send newsletters back into the past. We totally would’ve given this guy a hand.
Beyond the shaving and stink eradicating that come with your mornings, there’s a grooming practice that’s often overlooked — eyebrow maintenance.
Some men were born with perfect eyebrows, the type that don’t need pruning. Some of those men will die with perfect eyebrows, too, just like you guys with badass curly hair. The bastards. But for a lot of men, those two little strips of hair will warrant a lifetime of taming (even though they’re kind of awesome considering ophthalmologists believe eyebrows are evolution’s way to stop stuff like sweat and debris from getting in your eyes).
And let’s not start with the indignity of a man having his eyebrows “shaped.”
You know the guy at the gym who looks at himself too much, the guy with the eyebrows that look drawn on? It makes you wonder what’s worse, that or a straight-up unibrow.
It’s odd we don’t care more about this part of our faces.
The truth is, a man’s eyebrows ought to look as good as his hair, and so they need just as much attention and care.
“Mel,” as her works mates know her, doesn’t just cut hair like the best of them. She’s just as adept at beard trims, straight-razor shaves and — yes — eyebrow management. Image: Edward Ng
There’s nothing that commands unwanted attention like a unibrow, or eyebrows so wiry they could sand wood. For the record, this is not meant to slam hairy men. Being hairy is great. But, weird eyebrows make your eyes look just as weird. So, it’s simple: If it stands to reason that it’s great being hairy, then eyebrow management is just a part of living said greatness. Just like spending a fortune on imported parts is part of enjoying a German sports car. Tradeoffs. Compromise. Call it whatever you want.
George Harrison was cool, and he made his near-unibrow look just as cool. Still, know this is a risky move.
Illustration: Mario Zucca
Of course, history’s proven few men have, against all odds, look cool with one ‘brow. Think of former Beatle, George Harrison, or Anthony Davis of the NBA’s LA Lakers (who once trademarked the look with the catchphrase, “Fear the Brow.”). Understand these are the rarest of exceptions, and mimicking them, while ballsy, runs the risk of rendering you that guy with the unibrow.
And if your brows are wild, bless your virility. But a quick, yet mindful clean-up — when done well — takes care of what stands out while keeping things looking natural.
To help you get this right, we consulted the advice of Melissa L'Étoile, a senior-level barber at Axe & Hatchet’s Liberty Village location. Besides grooming beards out of biblical passages, L'Étoile’s seen more messed up eyebrows than you’d think, so they’re no match for her skills.
Let’s begin.
First, Invest In A Good Pair of Tweezers (And If You’re Hairy, Get A Quality Trimmer, Too).
While a pair of tweezers is simple as hell, you don’t want something cut-rate either. And if you don’t want to think about this beyond pulling out your phone and spending some money, the best you’ll find right now is the classic, stainless steel iteration by Tweezerman. Not too fancy, but well-made nonetheless, these people get it. There’s just enough heft to hold the thing with confidence, and their latest instruments have wider handles for a better grip.
What kind of tip — flat or point, right? You might benefit from investing in both, but that all depends on your needs. When in doubt, remember this: Flat (and even slant) tip tweezers are a reliable, all-purpose choice, while point-tip tweezers specialize in getting out ingrown hairs and the super-fine ones you only notice under intense, CIA torture room lights.
The Process
Wash Up: You’ll need to clear up the area in which you’re about to work. Use an anti-bacterial face wash that’s easy on skin and free of artificial crap like parabens and sodium laureth sulphate, the latter of which Health Canada considers a “minor human health priority” (and they’ve flagged it for “future” assessments).
Target the Temples And The In-Between: “Some guys grow hair between the tip (or “tail”) of their eyebrows and the area around their temples,” says L'Étoile. “What’s key is to not to tweeze a lot around the tails, or you’ll put a dent into the shape.” You don’t need your eyebrows defined for them to look polished. They just need to be cleaned up.
Clench Up And Go: Pull your skin taught around the area you’re about to pluck, then get at it. “Always start in the middle, where a unibrow usually forms,” confirms L'Étoile. “Just make sure the gap you create is no wider than the inner corner of your eyes.”
Work Your Way Out: Pluck slowly, yet firmly, making sure you go from the inside outward on one ‘brow, then the same on the other. You’ll know you’re doing this right when you can see the root on the end of the follicle you tweeze.
Mind Your Natural Shape: “Remember, it’s about cleaning stray hairs around the tail,” says L'Étoile. “This way you’ll retain the natural shape of the eyebrow.” And don’t go too fast or you could wind up with lopsided eyebrows.
Never Shave the ‘Brows: “Plucking or waxing’s the best for this,” says L'Étoile. “If you shave your eyebrows they’ll grow back quickly and you’ll have to shave a lot.” No one wants that, so while the ease and speed of shaving might tempt you, don’t do it. And if waxing sounds more appealing — you sadist — then grab a good wax strip kit you can use at home. No mess, no fuss, just how you like.
Lose The Length: You’re almost there. “Finish off by taking care of the longer ones, the ones that stand out,” says L'Étoile. “Do this by combing the eyebrows upward with a comb, then, with a pair of scissors (preferably eyebrow scissors), snip with care, making sure you follow the upper contour of your eyebrows… and don’t go any shorter.”
Make sure you wash that face again (using that same Parabens and SLS-free product); You’ll clean any pores you opened with the tweezers. And if you spot any redness, just rub a pinky’s worth of vitamin E cream on it and it’ll go away. We never look past what Webber’s makes. Remember that old-school looking tube you’d find in a First Aid kit? The one with the blue and white branding? That’s Webber’s, and it heals anything from small cuts to minor skin irritations.
One more thing: If you’ve got particularly thick eyebrows, a multi-purpose facial trimmer’s your best bet (we’re big fans of what Wahl makes). But don’t forget the following: “If you use a trimmer, make sure setting’s not too short,” says L'Étoile. “Otherwise, that eyebrow hair could grow back out even thicker and look like a brush.” Not to mention an unsteady hand’s not to be trusted when it comes to this art, so if yours isn’t, have this taken care of at the shop.
And if you try it, don’t come knocking if you make any ‘brow craters.